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It is important to understand what you like by yourself – so it is easier to negotiate this with your partners so that you can create intimacy in your relationship

Masturbation is an activity you can do that only requires yourself. It can be done with simple thrusting, changing the rhythm and pressure. Remember, it is easier to move your hips than your wrist!

It is important to set the mood for your ‘sexy self’. So clean up, make the bed, light candles, brush your teeth, be private – make sure you have the freedom to make some noise, play music – do all the things you would expect your partner to do for you – because you are your sex partner.

Frequent orgasms can strengthen your immune system.

Position yourself so your genitals are facing outwards - you can stand, sit, kneel, lounge or lay down. You can keep your clothes on, or take them off.

Then start touching different parts of your body – your hands, face, neck, breasts, thighs and genitals. You can touch yourself by stroking, rubbing, pinching, tapping, stretching, scratching, kneading, flicking, pricking, tickling, twisting, pushing or pulling. Change touch types and location on your body – masturbation should be a whole body experience.

Match your strokes with your breath and then mismatch them. With all this action blood will rush around your body. You want the blood to become oxygenated – so increase your breathing – like you hear in the movies. Moan the breaths, hold them, laugh them – and change them from short ones to low ones to long ones.

Variation can be in the speed. With faster movement for heightened arousal and slower movements for wider arousal. Move around to keep it interesting. This experience is about you as a lover – so fantasise about yourself. Do whatever you want and whatever feels good for you!

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to dress up for it!

Check in with your body and make sure you are enjoying yourself.

Make sure you do this again and again over time. This will make sure you understand your body, as well as what turns you on and gives you pleasure.


For more information about masturbation visit:

Get the Facts – masturbation


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